


The Chronicles of Shadow Roundhouse Kicking Silver in the Back of the Head

by IR0N_0XIDE



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Other, based on that one scene in sonic 06 lmao, doesnt have an update schedual tbh, enjoy i guess?? lmao, like seriously dont take this literally this is my joke fic, literal shitpost
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-09
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-05-04 06:06:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14586612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IR0N_0XIDE/pseuds/IR0N_0XIDE
Summary: From that one lame fan of Sonic the Hedgehog (2006), comes the newest and freshest and dankest shit-post of them all: TCoSRKSitBotH (the chronicles of shadow roundhouse kicking silver in the back of the head). Embark on a journey between plotless chapters of pure agonizing randomness straight from my demented teenage brain, following the tale of an edgy-ass emo hedgehog named Shadow and a gay fluffy hedgehog named Silver as they experience lots of Silver-abuse.Seriously, don't take this literally. This is here just for shits and giggles.





	1. Chapter 1

Once upon a time, Shadow, Sonic, and Silver were having a playdate. Sonic went to the store to get shit so he left Silver and Shadow alone in the house.

“Hey Shadow, want to be gay?” Silver asked. Shadow was appaled because not only was that gay, that was actually pedophillia because Silver was 14 and Shadow was immortal but also 50+ years old according to the Sonic the Hedgehog wiki. I dunno man, this is just wiki facts.  


“Hell no, Silver, you are a weirdo. Get away from me,” Shadow responded, with a horrified look.

“But Shadow, all the fans ship us despite our ages. And thus, we must be gay,” Silver said. Shadow had enough of this shit and so he held up that damn fourth chaos emerald.

“Chaos control!” he shouted. And then he roundhouse kicked Silver in the back of the head, who fell and fainted for about 5 hours.

The end!!1!


	2. Chapter 2

Shadow went to the grocery store and bought some shit. Then, he was walking home from the groceryry store with his bag of food. Or whatever he bought.

Along the way, he saw Silver. Silver ran up to him.

“Hi Shadow! What did you buy at the grocery store?” he asked cheerfully.

“I just bought a ton of cartons of chocolate marshmallow eggs,” Shadow responded.

“Can I have them?” Silver questioned.

“No.”

“Why?”

“Because I said so. Don’t be a bitch about it,” Shadow said.

“U suck,” Silver yelled, and began walking away. But Shadow got triggered. He used chaos control and kicked Silver in the back of the head and knocked him down.

“No u,” Shadow said.

TH E END aGAIN !!!!!!!!1


	3. Chapter 3

Insert a plot here

Shadow le kicks silver bc he feels like it

 

Thats also child abuse btw and thas NO GOOD

If some black hedgehog kicks u in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, first say NO. Then nyoom on out of there! And tell a trusted adult, like Big the Cat. cause apparently hes the only mobian in sonic who seems to be classified as an “adult”.

The end.


	4. Chapter 4

Shadow-kun and Silver-chan were having an anime death battle, using frikin’ magical weeaboo weapons or something.

    “Shadow-kun senpai! Can we ever put our differences aside and stop our warfare!? Sonic-san is very concerned about our relationship!” Silver-chan cried, his voice a singy-songy mix between his normal high male voice and a Japanese school girl.

    “No, Silver-chan! We must use our powerful weapons of mass destruction to defeat each other!” Shadow-kun spat in response. He used some sort of magical DBZ power or whatever to shoot a large beam of energy at Silver-chan, sending him backward. But Silver-chan would not give up on their terrible relationship!

    “You baka! When will you learn…” Silver-chan began speaking. He was surrounded in a blinding ice-colored light, charging up his powers. Shadow-kun let out a gasp, bracing for the next attack. He knew one thing for sure; Silver-chan’s power levels were over nine-thousand!

    “...That your actions have consequences!?” With that, Silver-chan let out his loudest sammyclassicsonicfan scream and that was that.

 

    Silver-chan walked up to Shadow-kun’s limp body on the ground. The strong foe was still alive, but only barely. Silver-chan kneeled over him and held out a hand, offering him help to get up.

    “I don’t want to hurt you any longer, senpai! Let us join forces and stop the evil Eggman-sama together! Take my hand!” Silver-chan said gently, his large anime eyes sparkling magically in the low-light area. His smile was soft and wide, welcoming.

    The unexpected plotwist! Shadow-kun was not defeated yet!

    The black hedgehog smirked and let out a small chuckle, unlike Knuckles.

    “Omae wa no shinderu!” Shadow-kun cried, reaching to his feet in a second.

    “N-Nani!?” Silver whimpered, and just like that, Shadow-kun powerfully roundhouse kicked Silver-chan in the back of the head, sending him flying.

 

    Silver-chan died that day from the impact. This has been “Top 10 Saddest Anime Deaths” with your host MVCINT0SH; hope you enjoyed! Make sure to like, comment, and subscribe! Ecks deeeeee!!!

 

The end


	5. Chapter 5

It was a beautiful day outside. Birds were singing, flowers were blooming: and on days like these, kids like Silver, were going to have a bad time.

Under the rays of sunshine that pelted on the area, two hedgehogs stood face-to-face. They had just had a very intense Sonic 06 battle, with plenty of glitches and “it’s no use”’s. One was a dark-colored edgy mess, while the other was a prepubescent telekinetic wreck.

“With the power of Chaos Control, I will roundhouse kick you in the back of the head!” Shadow exclaimed, preparing himself.

“Alright, edgy hog, let’s see you do it,” Silver taunted.

Shadow glanced around for a moment, and found a bird flying in the sky in the distance. He pointed to it.

“Look! A distraction!” he called.

“Ooh, look, something to look at while you kick me!” Silver said joyously, looking over at said bird.

With a loud shout, Shadow walked casually up to Silver and swung his leg around, pounding him in the head. Silver fell as he exclaimed the Roblox death sound.

 

The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ur mom gae


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> based on baldi's basics, bitches

“Welcome to my schoolhouse- I’m Shadow the Hedgehog!” a dark hedgehog boomed, pridefully smirking at the smaller white-furred hedgehog before him. The smaller hedgehog, Silver, smiled up at him shyly.

“Hello, Shadow. I’m just here to collect my friend- Sonic’s- notebooks that he left here for the summer!” Silver stated. Shadow nodded, looking down at the small one softly.

“Alright! There should be a notebook in each door here. Go into each room and successfully answer my little math trivia to retrieve them!” Shadow told him. Silver nodded in gratitude and made his way to the first room.

 

Inside the room was a couple desks, and the blackboard had “Math + Math = Math” written sloppily on it. Silver spotted the yellow notebook on the teachers desk, and walked up to it. Next to it was a green iPad-like device, labeled “You Can Think Pad”. Silver picked it up and booted up the system.

From the screen came a small window in the bottom-lefthand corner, and a math problem written next to it. From the flimsy speaker-holes on the top of the device came the static-y sound of Shadow’s voice.

“Now it’s time for everyone’s  _ favorite  _ subject: MATH! Answer the problems correctly, and I’ll give you a special reward!” Shadow spoke in an uppity-tone. Silver read the problem; “7 + 7”. He giggled at how easy it was, and wrote “14” with a small stylus attached to the device. A small check appeared next to it, and another problem revealed itself.

“You’re doing great!” Shadow encouraged from the device. The next problem was “6 + 4”, and Silver wrote “10”. Once more, the green check-mark flashed and up came the last problem: “3 - 5”. Silver once more wrote the answer- “-2”- and heard Shadow’s voice once more:

“Great job! Come out and get your prize! A shiny quarter!” 

Silver smiled and picked up the yellow notebook, heading outside of the classroom. Shadow stood there, an unusually large coin floating mysteriously next to him. Silver took it happily and rushed to the other classroom, which had a black notebook. Already used to the drill, Silver took up the “You Can Think Pad” and began answering its problems.

There was only one problem, however.

At the third question, the problem was a mess of overlapping numbers and unreadable letters. Silver was hoping to hear the problem from Shadow, but it was only yet the same.

“What’s-” it blanks out- “plus-” once more, a horribly loud static blanks out his words- “times-” blank- “equals?” Silver was genuinely confused, and profusely entered a “6”, hoping his guess was correct. At the incorrect answer, he felt the calming aura of the schoolhouse flee, and a cold shiver crossed his spine. He nervously looked down at the screen of the pad, and saw a very disappointed Shadow glaring at him. On the pad were the words “I get angrier for every problem you get wrong”.

Silver jumped in his fur when he heard a sudden tap. He turned his head slowly, and saw Shadow looming over him from behind. The hedgehog was tapping his rocket shoe, the loud and piercing sound echoing off of the silent halls.

“Chaos control!” and with a loud scream, that tapping foot slammed straight into the back of Silver’s head, knocking him down on his face. He died that day.

 

The end… or is it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> smoke weed


End file.
